It's actually been so long since I posted here that the site deleted the cookie which stores my name and password so that I don't have to sign in or anything.

Well, it's summer now, so I'll have a lot of time (especially if I can't find a job...), so I'll actually make up the last three weeks or so. I've got a load of pictures I'm gonna show, which I should have by tomorrow after the non digital ones are developed and scanned (from prom and other events).

There's also a load of Headlines I've got sitting around which I need to put on here, so that'll get done as well. Maybe I'll even post on a regular basis again, who knows?

In the last week there's been the last day of school, prom, the beach, graduation parties... and more coming in the next week, too. Aside from the two weeks I spent in New Mexico three years ago and the week I spent in Spain last year, this has probably been one of the best times of my life... so unbelievably fun. I don't remember a recent time I've just felt so consistently content with everything at once (that's as gushy as I get).

More coming soon...

I promise (and that promise has meaning)

How's it hangin, Taylor?

Sorry for the lack of Headlines this week. I'll slap em up here after this post (before it, technically), so scroll down after this. Despite the apparent non work of end of year, there was a lot to do. A lot of math and a lot of spanish to make up.
And speaking of spanish, we did a presentation yesterday, which was done in spectacular senior fashion. It went something like this:
17 May, after having the project for two weeks, 11:30 am: Hey Mar, did you guys do anything for the project? No, not yet. James is supposed to call us, I think. Oh, okay.
4:30 pm: Hey Mar, anything yet? No, not yet. Oh, alright.. well, we still have plenty of time.
9:00 pm: Hey Mar, anything? No...
11:00 pm: Hey Mar, I finally found James, he mailed me what he had, let's write all the dialogue now.
12:30: Whew, finally done. Well, at least we have seven days to reherse this.
24 May, seven days later, 8:30 pm: Hey Mar, umm, it turns out I'm not gonna be home for a few more hours... are we going to reherse this at all, or are you just taking care of it? Nah, we sorta organized stuff, I've got a prop shark and some sunglasses, so we figure we'll be okay doing it sorta improv. Okay, sounds good!
25 May, beginning of 3rd period: Okay, we can use the wall as a prop... and the table! Yeah, and we can make a sign with this piece of paper!
Five minutes later: Ay dios mio, perdió mi equilibrio! No, Maria! Te ayudaré!
One minute later: Ay! Un tiburón!
And I throw myself wildly across the floor as a shark goes for my jugular.
El Fin.

In my next post I'm gonna write about Langhorne and Reim, cause Julia and I had a long conversation about them. And let's face it, they're the best ever.

Okay, mom is now telling me to skidaddle, so I'll put up the headlines tomorrow. Promise, scout's honor.

I just finished yawning, or something.. thanks for flattering me, Eliot. I think it really brings out the hazel in my eyes.

Every once in a while, Conan does a sketch called "Conan O'Brien Hates My Homeland." It supposedly arose after he made a few jokes about Finland, and someone from Finland sent him a postcard saying how insulted they were. So he started doing a few countries every once in a while, being really mean. It sounds best with him doing them, but try reading them out loud when you do. Theses are the ones done so far (a few might be missing).

Afghanistan
The bad news is, there's a new article about everyone farming opium.The good news is, you can't read.
Albania
The perfect getaway for people who love Kosovo, but hate the working phone service.
Algeria
It took you eight years to beat France.
Andorra
How does it feel, being Luxembourg's bitch?
Angola
Hey, call me when your life expectancy catches up with your inflation rate.
Azerbaijan
Believe it or not, you can use oil for more than just killing seals.

The Bahamas
It takes a lot of rum to forget your major export is crawfish.
Bahrain
A thriving centre of trade and culture... until 2000 BC!
Bangladesh
If you can hear this, your television isn't underwater. Congratulations!
Barbados
There simply isn't a more beautiful island... to sail by on your way to Jamaica.
Belarus
Clay, sand, and chalk: Your richest natural resources are what a toddler throws up after a big day at preschool.
Belgium
The only European country to never successfully invade Belgium.
Belize
Get your camera; they're paving a road!
Benin
Keep practicing those voodoo spells and maybe someday you'll be as rich as Rwanda.
Bhutan
So they took away your freedom of the press? Who needs it when your only headline is "Bhutan Continues to Suck?"
Bolivia
Remember kids, you must be at least nine years old to overthrow the goverment.
Bosnia & Herzegovina
Nothing spells a bright future like signing your peace accord in Dayton, Ohio.
Botswana
Diamonds are forever; too bad your people check out at 35.
Brazil
Home to more than 800 species of unregulated breast implants.
Brunei
If there was ever an argument for the death penalty, it's chicken smuggling.
Bulgaria
So what if you misplaced a little weapons-grade uranium? The important thing is keeping track of all those hand-made doileys and goat hair rugs.
Burkina Faso
In the traditional tribal language, that's Burkina for "land of" and Faso for "people who want to get the hell out of Burkina Faso."
Burma
The bad news is, you've got rampant malaria. The good news is, it doesn't stop the kids from making those shirts.
Burundi
All that coffee in a country with no reason to wake up.

Cambodia
How many temples does it take before you guys realize God isn't listening?
Cameroon
Not to be mistaken with the macaroon, a small, chewy cookie... with a longer life expectancy!
Canada
With massive overpopulation threatening the globe, Canadians maintain a population of less than 35 million. How do they do it? Zero sex appeal!
Cape Verde
Millions visit your island nation... to refuel their planes!
Central African Republic
So bad, the gorillas learn sign language for "Poach me."
Chad
Good news: Ustad Ali Khan is headlining the Locust Plague Festival.
Chile
The good news is, it's finally legal to get a divorce. The bad news is, who gets the active volcano and who gets the 55,000 square miles of lifeless desert?
China
If you're gonna be in prison, it might as well be for no reason.
Colombia
You'll come for the enticing beauty of the Caribbean Sea. You'll stay because you've been kidnapped and locked in the trunk of a Dodge Dart.
Comoros
On a list of the world's purchasing power, you're ranked 222. Did I mention there are only 190 countries?
Democratic Republic of Congo
Where even a poor boy with no prospects can grow up to be run over by a presidential motorcade.
Republic of Congo
Without you, who would the elephants trample?
Costa Rica
Thanks for giving us a place to dump our potheads.
Cote D'Ivoire
Cocoa, sugar, and mass killings. Are you a country or a Willy Wonka nightmare?
Croatia
Congratulations on your candidacy for the European Union. Imagine, if that comes through, it could employ two, maybe three people.
Cuba
Where "high-tech" means you've got a radio on your homemade raft.
Cyprus
Where the Mediterranean climate makes it a joy to spend each day mining asbestos.
Czech Republic
The country that explains why Kafka never wrote a happy story.

Denmark
Too bad you can't build a warm, sunny day out of Legos.
Djibouti
Imagine how great life would be if you had the rich natural resources of Ethiopia.
Dominica
Where the national catchphrase is "I'm sorry, officer, I didn't mean to interrupt your armed robbery."
Dominican Republic
The perfect place for anyone who's ever asked themself "Where'd my car go?"

East Timor
It takes a lot to admit you live on the bad side of Timor.
Ecuador
Street crime is on the rise, so keep your ransom note in an inside pocket.
Egypt
Where priceless ancient statues and mummies are so close, you can fly to London and see them at the British Museum.
El Salvador
Where no resumé is complete without the phrase "Supervised six-person death squad."
Equatorial Guinea
Congratulations, you just discovered vast oil reserves... I mean, we just discovered vast oil reserves. *evil laugh*
Eritrea
You only have one TV station, but cheer up - it's got locust reports on the eights!
Estonia
Home of the European flying squirrel, the only Estonian mammal that's not an alcoholic.
Ethiopia
I can't do this one, let's move on.

Fiji
If you're visiting Fiji, you have to go snorkeling, 'cause it's the best way to flee cannibals.
Finland
We're so dumb, we can't wait to be insulted to send a meaningless postcard with a tire on the front.
(and another)
You've had over 5,000 years of culture, and the world's most famous Finn is still Huckleberry.
France
You gave us the term "deja vu," as in "Wow, I have this weird feeling you've been obnoxious and arrogant before. Deja vu!"
(Wait a miniute, this is France, so I think I can't do just one.)
Rimbaud, Baudelaire, Gauguin, Manet: You're number one when it comes to great minds that died of syphillis.

Gabon
You have to question a country that grants five terms to a man called "President Bongo."
The Gambia
The only nation brave enough to say "Let those offshore oil reserves wait. We've got a good thing going with these peanuts and palm kernels."
Georgia
Where Europe meets Asia and says "Hey, why don't we both dump our crap here?"
Germany
The great 20th-century power that said, "Ditch Einstein, get Hasselhoff."
Ghana
The 'h' is silent, like a room full of people after you ask "What's worthwhile about Ghana?"
Greece
Big news: Historians now think the first marathon took place in August 490 BC, not September. That means nothing good has come out of Greece for a month longer than previously believed.
Grenada
When you're at the end of a grueling fifteen-hour day peeling the husks off nutmeg, remember this: without you, the world would have to sprinkle its eggnog with cinnamon.
Guatemala
Where the Mayans invented the zero, as in "What are the chances this shirt was made by someone over the age of eight? Zero!"
Guinea
Even guinea pigs have the good sense to claim they're actually from Peru.
Guinea-Bissau
The only book that mentions it is The Audubon Guide to Locusts.
Guyana
The Eskimos have sixty words for "snow." The Guyanans have eighty words for "dysentery."

Haiti
You just celebrated two hundred years of independence. Congratulations. Now make a wish and blow out your burning pile of tires.

One thing we must do more often is go to Wall Park after midnight, and play hide and seek in the castle. We did that last night, except it was only around 10:30, and the lights were still on, and the cops kicked us out. It was so much fun, though, and I can only imagine how great it'd be in almost total darkness. I had so many good hiding spots in my mind. We shall return.

Yesterday was pretty nice, as will be this entire week. Instead of actually going to school, I went and took a GED test. For anyone who didn't know, our school was doing some sort of pilot GED test for future years. A bunch of kids signed up, and I got in when someone else in my homeroom cancelled. We came to school at normal time, but instead of going to classes, we went to the Little Theater and took a painfully easy test for three hours. They gave us Munchkins, orange juice, pizza, soda, and danish, and we got to leave school at 11:00. It was great. Eliot and I went back to his house, talked for a while, then Andy, who took a day off, came over, and we went and saw Unleashed.

Erek's pro movie review: Don't see Unleashed. Morgan Freeman was good, and the parts where Jet Li wasn't kicking ass were the better parts, in my opinion. I want my seven bucks back.

We went back to Eliot's, and played Tetris for about two hours on Xbox. We gotta do a Tetris tournament sometime, it was so much freakin fun. By the end, I had gotten to such a high level that the blocks were falling straight down, as if you pressed the fall down button. It was insane. We finished, got up, and were all really worn out, it was so great.

Anyway, to regularize it, I'll post the Headlines each Monday, but from last week's show. Except today, which is Tuesday.

Show your mother that you care


This'uns true, I reckun


Only special students make this list


This happened cause you're an asshole, you asshole


This is what happens when the newspaper editors don't check the layout

And right next to it...


Police need more brutality


Mmmmmm!


Alanis Morissette may not know irony, but this dog sure as hell does


And these must be what that dog was looking for


I guess this guy's also got the irony thing down pretty well


Back to Tennessee for a moment


Look carefully at this picture, it might take you a minute or two

Now you tell me what's wrong


Look at the caption, and then the background...

NOTE: I fixed the link. It was a broken address before.

Would I lie to you? No, and I'm not gonna. This is quite possibly the funniest thing Conan has ever done, and even if you hate Conan (I don't see how that's even possible, asshole), you'll still be hysterical after watching this. First, go here: Conan's website. Then click "video moments" on the menu on the left. When that new window opens, scroll down and click on the 10th page. When that loads, scroll down and click on "Iraq Made for TV Movie" and enjoy.

Yes, Lin, I meant later this week. I have no ability to remember to post on here. If anyone's bored and wants to read about crap I've done, go on, cause I'm bored and I just feel like writing and probably complaining. So Taylor, read on, and Audrey, stop right here.

Friday we had poker here after an argument with my mom, in which she claimed I never told her it was to be here this week (I did, I remember explicitely telling her, and I heard her answer me with a big "okay"). Anyway, after about five minutes, I think it came back to her, cause she calmed down considerably and offered to get some pizza. She likes a day's notice on poker, cause it means she has to feed people, and she hates doing it last minute, which is understandable. She just has to remember when I give her that notice. Anyway, I lost money for about the first time in three months, so I guess I was way past due. It all went down the drain after I had 4's over 8's, and Dan had 8's over 4's. Man, what a burn. I did it to Justin twice before in past weeks, though, but now I know how it feels.

Saturday was supposed to rain a lot, but was beautiful instead, further proving my theory that all weathermen are frauds, complete and total frauds. Went to frisbee practice for many hours, until dad came to pick me up... in the 'vette! It's been in the shop for close to a month now, getting lots of small, incidental things repaired. But it was gorgeous, and we took 20-25 minutes getting home from Ogontz (a three minute ride). I apparently missed a barbacue at Kissel's cause I skim many frisbee emails, which I was kinda irritated about, cause I love barbacues. C'mon, who doesn't? Freakin vegetarians, that's who. Then off to see Aida, which, like all Cheltenham productions, was amazing. Not Les Miz, but still amazing. Lin was pretty blown away, by her lack of "let's see what I can find wrong" comments after the first scene. And the dancing was great. I'm again justified in my belief that life would be so much better if everyone danced instead of walked. Roving dance gangs, like You Got Served, would abound. It'd be so much fun.

Sunday was Mother's Day, of course. I got my mom some flowers and a postponed breakfast in bed, since she got up early to do Race for the Cure, which I really should've done as well. We went over to my grandmother's (Nana's) after I watched M*A*S*H (best show ever aside from West Wing), and my dad and I did garden work for a few hours, then went back home and cruised around in the 'vette for an hour, cause it's awesome, so awesome. I then did a load of yardwork around the house, too, cause it was there, and everyone was doing it. Contrary to Dan, I enjoy it for some reason. It's relaxing to see the patterns the lawnmower leaves (like raking sand, which I coincidentally think is stupid). We then went back over to Nana's for dinner, which is amazing, cause let's face it: grandmothers can freakin cook. Then I finished the evening up with some good ol' Family Guy. Oh, I love Sundays again.